Family Time in Kyiv

We’ve been busy, there’s not doubt about that!. We now have our hands full with a 2 year old and a 7 year old. But it’s nap time right now and while Donna is on a quest for souvenirs and gifts downtown, I can hang out here at the apartment in Kyiv and do a blog posting.

So, what’s been happening? Well, first of all can you believe the Riders are 5-0?!? OK, OK….I guess you want to hear what is happening in our family. Well, after a bit of bureaucratic power-playing involving finalizing our documents to the satisfaction of the orphanage director, we first enjoyed a “good bye concert” for Valya and Vanya at the orphanage Monday afternoon. It involved some singing and dancing by the children, including Ukrainian dancing. (We have also found out since then that Vanya can do some pretty good Ukey dance moves himself.)

Then at 5:45 a.m. on Tuesday, July 29, our life as a family started together. We picked up the kids from the orphanage and headed for the airport for the flight from Mariupol to Kyiv. We are now in an apartment in a nice part of town in Kyiv and things are going well—keeping in mind that we are dealing with a two year old…yikes…lol. Other than the normal routines of meals, afternoon naps and going to the park, the kids have also become Kyiv veterans: riding the Metro (subway), going to the Canadian embassy to get their visas, visiting officials at the Ukrainian Adoption Office, eating at Pyzata Hata (a great cafeteria for Ukrainian food), shopping at markets, going to a toy store, and cramming into the Metro train cars. Everyone has been having fun.

Well, fun a lot of time I should say…I (Murray) have also learned a few lessons about dealing with a two year old. After I made a decision that kind of messed up our routine for the day, we (mostly Donna actually) had to deal with a two year old tantrum and we are finding that that is not easy. Donna got the short end of the stick on that one…Sorry Donna…. So all you veteran parents out there, what’s the secret to dealing with a two year old? Is it like Survivor – outplay, outwit, outlast? We’d love to hear your comments on this question for the ages.

Now, a word about the joys of being an international adoption family: Sure, we have missed the magic and wonder of pregnancy, the miracle of birth and the “joy” of all night feedings. But, we are learning that there are some special things that we are experiencing that we’d have taken for granted if we were a birth family. We have been able to watch a seven year old boy’s joy of discovery after living a sheltered life in an orphanage. I will always remember the simple discoveries like a straw which is bendable, how a no-touch hand dryer works, an automatic sliding door, the overwhelming freak-out of seeing a large toy store for the first time, and getting a new pair of shoes that are his and his alone. Everyday we look forward to the new discoveries that are around the corner. We also enjoy how they are both growing already: Valya chattering like she’s a Long and climbing stairs; and Vanya going from grabbing a hand and timidly getting on Metro escalator to insisting on getting on himself, saying “Look Ma, no hands!”

And it has also been such a joy as parents to see brother and sister reunite. Vanya is such a great brother to his little sister. He loves to push Valya around in the stroller, and makes sure she has all her things when we leave the apartment. And she has been looking up to him more and more as they do things together. There may have always been a brother-sister bond there, but now it is growing with each day.

What’s to come for our family? We are going back to the Canadian Embassy today as we have been invited to a pub/reception for the outgoing Canadian Ambassador to Ukraine. Then tomorrow, while you are cheering on the Riders against the ‘Stamps, Murray and Evan will be cheering at a football match, too. They are going to their first soccer game as father & son, to watch the Kyiv Dynamo against the Kharkiv Metallist. Go Riders! Go Dynamo!

Then it’s the flight home on Sunday and life begins at home. We (Donna and Murray) are looking forward to getting back to Canada. But we need to keep in mind that Evan and Valentina will be the ones that may be facing culture shock. No more Russian speakers or Russian alphabet; different food; living in the countryside vs the city; living with a couple of boring adults rather than with a bunch of kids; wanting to play with other kids but having to deal with strange languages. As much as there will be new wonders and lots of excitement, all of us—parents, family and friends—will have to be sensitive to how a couple of little kids have to deal with all this change. We must all give them lots of encouragement, love and time. And then, before you know it, they will be rambunctious, rollicking, rotten little wonderful Canadian kids, just like the rest of them out there. Look out, they are on their way!!

SEE YOU SOMETIME SOON IN S’TOON!!!