Merry Christmas from Vanya and Valya

Dobryden and Khrystos Narodyvsia! Hello and Christ is Born!

Well this is the first time I’ve ever tried to do one of these “Christmas Letters”. Mama and Papa say that everyone wants to know about us so we might as well write the Christmas letter instead of them. My name is Evan and Mama and Papa call me, Vanya. I’ve asked my sister to help me out but she’s only two and a half. Here, I’ll let her type:

J:;ldksjf poo ap0w afs;dk poo ;ksdjfa oida; bye

OK, OK, Valya. She says “poo” a lot right now, even when she types.

So, the year began with me and Valya at “Center Opeki”. It’s a big building in Mariupol, Ukraine with a whole bunch of kids in it right from little babies to big kids that are really old, like about 18. We all were in different groups. I was with kids 6 to 7 and Valya was with little kids about 1 or 2 years old. I saw her sometimes when we were outside at the same time, but we mostly were with our own groups where we ate, slept and played together. It was a good place with good caregivers. Anna Nicolai was my favorite. I really liked her.

I was going to school and learning a lot of Ukrainian and all the Ukrainian letters and sounds. I could even read books! I liked to play lego and go outside and play football and I played with lots of boys and girls. Valya liked to go with her group outside and chase after a ball and kick it around. Any ball is still her most favourite thing.

Lots of times kids would talk about new Mamas and Papas coming to take care of them. Sometimes we would see strange men and ladies come and meet and visit with kids and they’d tell us other kids about their new Mamas and Papas. I wondered if some day there would be a Mama and Papa for me and Valya. But each day was kind of like the next. Some days we did special things and in the summer our group went out at a summer camp on the beach on the Sea of Azov. It was fun being there but one day the grown ups came and took me back…after that everything changed for me and Valya.

Its time for Mama and Papa to jump in: Yes, most of you know the awesome, incredible and wonderful changes to our lives this year with the adoption of Evan and Valentina. Our adoption journey began many years ago with research into adoption in Ukraine. Then, it was finding the facilitators that would help us. Then we were submitting the paperwork and applications, then again, and then one last time. We felt that after 3 years and 3 applications it wasn’t meant to be. What we didn’t know was that it was meant to be. We just had to be patient and wait that long for two little miracle wonders to be put into our hands and hearts--- Evan (a.k.a Vanya, born May 4, 2001) and Valentina (a.k.a. Valya, born March 22, 2006). It began with a letter on December 28, 2007 from the national adoption department in Ukraine notifying us that we had a meeting in Kyiv on July 1, 2008. That was the first step in the final chapter of our adoption journey.

The planning began. Flights were booked. Work on the house went into high gear. We did make a quick trip down to Arizona and Mexico in February as part of Murray’s work. Otherwise, our focus was on getting ready for the trip. We expected to be in Ukraine anywhere from 6 to 8 weeks. We left on June 25th, a quick overnight in Frankenfurt, and then couple days in Kyvi, Ukraine. Then on July 1, 2008 we met with officials from the national adoption dept. and were given a file for two little children at an orphanage in Mariupol, Ukraine. After making travel arrangements, a 12 hr overnight train ride and 2 hours by taxi followed by a 6 hour wait to see the Director of the Orphanage and another night of waiting, at 11 a.m. on Saturday, July 5th our life changed.

(This is Vanya again.) I got back to the Centre Opeki in the morning. They said I was going back to meet my new Mama and Papa. I hadn’t seen my sister Valya in a while. When I got there I saw her with two strangers, a nice looking lady and a big tall goofy looking guy. I was scared and confused, but they brought puzzles for me to play with which I really liked. Valya cried a lot at first but then they gave her a ball and she was happy after that. I started calling them Mama and Papa right away. Over the next few sleeps, Mama and Papa would come and visit Valya and me every day. We played soccer and Frisbee outside, had snacks, played cards and Mama started teaching me numbers and letters in English.

Then one day Mama and Papa picked us up very early in the morning and we flew in a plane to Kyiv. We stayed in an apartment there for a few days and we had lots of fun. We got to ride elevators, escalators and the Metro. We went to the zoo, ate at restaurants, and I went with Papa to a soccer game. Then we got on a very big plane to Canada (Aug 3rd). It was a long trip. I was a good boy, but Valya didn’t sleep much and cried a lot. Mama and Papa were happy to be in their home, but it was bit scary for me and Valya. Lots of strange faces and strange places and no one spoke Russian!

In the summer we did lots of stuff. I pulled a whole bunch of weeds and I made $25 that I used to buy my first bike!! Valya got a tricycle too and we rode round and round in the garage. Pretty soon I was riding on my own and I’d go visit my neighbor friends like Rachel and Madison and Emmet. I even lost two teeth right after coming home, and the tooth fairy left some money under my pillow. I spent a lot of time taking care of Valya, too. Mama and Papa say I am a very good big brother.

On Aug 27th I started school at Bishop Filevich in Saskatoon in Grade 2. My teacher is Pani Julia and Pani Marissa. I learn in Ukrainian half the day and in English the other half. I have lots of fun at school learning and playing police and goblins at recess and jumping too much. Papa drives me in the morning and Mama and Valya stay home and they pick me up after school.

In the fall, me and Valya were very busy. We took swimming lessons. I took piano lessons and Valya went to play and music groups. We went to Uncle Ken’s and Auntie Monica’s wedding. We went on a trip to Edmonton to visit our new cousins, Kara and Natasha, and we got to go to the Waterpark. At Halloween we made pumpkins and I was Spiderman and Valya was a Chicken and we got lots of candy. At home we play downstairs, I play Webkinz with Dina the Dinosaur on the computer and we read books. I learned to skate; that was lots of fun! Mama and Papa look tired sometimes. I don’t know why though. It’s me and Valya that do all the running around.

Now, its really cold outside, and its only 4 sleeps to Christmas. I wrote my letter to Santa and asked for a remote car. I’ve been a good boy, but I don’t know about Valya. She always takes my toys. Anyway, we really like living in Canada and I like to play computers and want to go sliding and skating outside when it’s warmer.

Mama and Papa say: Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Here's some pictures of me and Valya with our Mama and Papa.

Ukraine’s Top Tens

Sunday, August 24

The last four weeks since we’ve returned have been a blur. We are sitting down during “nap time” to recollect on the trip. What better way to do it than some top ten lists:

Ukraine’s Top Ten Best
1. Bringing the kids home
2. Spending time with the kids
3. Meeting the kids
4. The way Ukraine’s culture has blossomed since Donna’s last visit in 1987
5. The food: Chocolate ice cream in the bag; bulk varenyky/perogies (esp cherry); picking up fresh bread at 6 a.m.; and good cheap beer anytime!
6. The markets (where “the Eagle” soared)
7. Ukrainian pop music on FM radio
8. Going to Chernivtsi and Western Ukraine (Kolomya, visiting relatives)
9. Ukrainian fashion—especially what the women wear (Note: This is a top ten item for Murray only)
10. Learning and reading Cyrillic language (Molodyez!!)

The Top Ten things we likely won’t miss about Ukraine
1. The freshly polluted air and heat of Mariupol
2. The traffic congestion in Kyiv, including dealing with parked cars as you walk on the sidewalks
3. Continually wearing a money belt at plus 30C temperatures with a big wad of cash.
4. . The sweet smells outside our apartments just before garbage day
5. Trying to speak Ukrainian to people in Eastern Ukraine who only insist on Russian
6. Doing business with Ukrainian taxi drivers, despite the meters in their cars
7. The bus ride from Kolomya to Vinnetsia on Ukraine’s bumpy and rolling roads
8. Dealing with Ukrainian officials who get off on power games (passport control; train stations; etc)
9. Kyiv Metro at rush hour (you feel like you need a rape kit after you get off the train); except when you have a 2 year old in your arms who parts the 'sea of masses' to get her own seat
10. 11 hour flight from Kyiv to Toronto with a two year old

The Top Ten things we looked forward to returning home:
1. Growing as a family
2. Getting to know the kids ourselves in our own home
3. The wonder and amazement of discovery for two new kids in Canada
4. Introducing our kids to family and friends
5. Sleeping in our own bed
6. The familiarity of home, including normal driving, clean and functioning bathroom facilities; fresh air (outside and in bathrooms too…), the English alphabet, and lettuce in salads
7. Watching the Riders win some more games (OK…so that hasn’t happened…I’m trying to convince myself that I’m not a jinx…it could be a 2 year old though ;-)…)
8. An early arrival back to Canada so that we could enjoy some Saskatchewan summer during August
9. All the toys that Murray gets to play with now
10. Just staying in one place and keeping a routine

It’s a Long Way to Tipperary – And a Helluva a lot Further to Saskatoon

Hello to all our blog followers. Yes, we have been back for four weeks now, but with settling in, buying supplies, meeting with family and friends, and most importantly being parents, the blog has been relegated to 15th or 50th fiddle. But, I finally have the time, energy and right headspace to get back into it, so here we go!

Let’s start with traveling home. Our last report was from Kyiv the day before we left. Our trip home on August 3rd began with a 7 a.m. wake up and ended with crashing into our own bed at 11:00 p.m. A 16 hour day? Not too bad. Well, actually with time changes it was a 25 hour day with 15 hours in the air enjoying a two year old.

But we were ready for that and prepared to deal with it. What we weren’t ready for was Ukrainian Passport Control at the beginning of our trip. Leaving the country requires clearance through Ukraine’s border officers. While I think this is primarily for their own citizens leaving, everyone is in the same mosh pit when it comes to getting through. What’s even more frustrating is to see the officials flipping through passports 4 or 6 times, stalling for no apparent reason. Although, I do understand that there are “expediting fees” that one can pay to arrange for faster treatment. Perhaps, this is why they stall with those who don’t “play the game”. After standing in line for 1.5 hours with many smokers around us, I was truly amazed that the official, after going through our documents repeatedly for 10 minutes, tapping his computer keyboard a few times, and generally dragging his ass, did not even look up to confirm that the kids we had with us matched the pictures in the passports that he so intensely examined.

So, we were off to a rough start; and then it was the 11 hour flight from Kyiv to Toronto and 3 hours more to Saskatoon. Some of the memories from that include:

Evan’s excitement in getting on a big plane and especially having the chance to use some really cool bathrooms;

Valya playing with every possible thing around her seat and Donna keeping her busy;

Murray and Vanya laughing and giggling as they sat beside each other. (I don’t remember why…must have been the children’s gravol for him and the sleeping pill for me…);

Valya doing laps around the aisles and one of us right behind her;

Valya’s timeout corner on the floor by the emergency exit at the back of the plane (She and I spent a fair amount of time on that floor);

Realizing that we were back in Canada as I gazed down at Newfoundland;

The joy and pleasantness of going through customs and immigration in Toronto, after our experience in Ukraine;

Timmy HoHo’s coffee at Lester B. Pearson airport;

Touching down at Diefenbaker Airport in Saskatoon!!

We made it!! Home with our new family!! All the time, effort and persistence (especially from Donna) had paid off. Some of Donna’s family and a few friends met us at the airport. And then our friend Boris, a Ukrainian ex pat drove us home. He had a car seat for Valya which we didn’t yet have in our vehicles.

We arrived home to a clean house, with a stocked fridge, a newly furnished bedroom for the kids, car seats, along with a bunch of clothes and toys. We are so thankful to everyone who helped out in different ways and for all your generosity in welcoming Evan and Valentina. You have all made it so much easier for both the little ones and the big ones to settle in!

We have many stories and pictures of settling in over the past four weeks; but that is for another blog posting…

Family Time in Kyiv

We’ve been busy, there’s not doubt about that!. We now have our hands full with a 2 year old and a 7 year old. But it’s nap time right now and while Donna is on a quest for souvenirs and gifts downtown, I can hang out here at the apartment in Kyiv and do a blog posting.

So, what’s been happening? Well, first of all can you believe the Riders are 5-0?!? OK, OK….I guess you want to hear what is happening in our family. Well, after a bit of bureaucratic power-playing involving finalizing our documents to the satisfaction of the orphanage director, we first enjoyed a “good bye concert” for Valya and Vanya at the orphanage Monday afternoon. It involved some singing and dancing by the children, including Ukrainian dancing. (We have also found out since then that Vanya can do some pretty good Ukey dance moves himself.)

Then at 5:45 a.m. on Tuesday, July 29, our life as a family started together. We picked up the kids from the orphanage and headed for the airport for the flight from Mariupol to Kyiv. We are now in an apartment in a nice part of town in Kyiv and things are going well—keeping in mind that we are dealing with a two year old…yikes…lol. Other than the normal routines of meals, afternoon naps and going to the park, the kids have also become Kyiv veterans: riding the Metro (subway), going to the Canadian embassy to get their visas, visiting officials at the Ukrainian Adoption Office, eating at Pyzata Hata (a great cafeteria for Ukrainian food), shopping at markets, going to a toy store, and cramming into the Metro train cars. Everyone has been having fun.

Well, fun a lot of time I should say…I (Murray) have also learned a few lessons about dealing with a two year old. After I made a decision that kind of messed up our routine for the day, we (mostly Donna actually) had to deal with a two year old tantrum and we are finding that that is not easy. Donna got the short end of the stick on that one…Sorry Donna…. So all you veteran parents out there, what’s the secret to dealing with a two year old? Is it like Survivor – outplay, outwit, outlast? We’d love to hear your comments on this question for the ages.

Now, a word about the joys of being an international adoption family: Sure, we have missed the magic and wonder of pregnancy, the miracle of birth and the “joy” of all night feedings. But, we are learning that there are some special things that we are experiencing that we’d have taken for granted if we were a birth family. We have been able to watch a seven year old boy’s joy of discovery after living a sheltered life in an orphanage. I will always remember the simple discoveries like a straw which is bendable, how a no-touch hand dryer works, an automatic sliding door, the overwhelming freak-out of seeing a large toy store for the first time, and getting a new pair of shoes that are his and his alone. Everyday we look forward to the new discoveries that are around the corner. We also enjoy how they are both growing already: Valya chattering like she’s a Long and climbing stairs; and Vanya going from grabbing a hand and timidly getting on Metro escalator to insisting on getting on himself, saying “Look Ma, no hands!”

And it has also been such a joy as parents to see brother and sister reunite. Vanya is such a great brother to his little sister. He loves to push Valya around in the stroller, and makes sure she has all her things when we leave the apartment. And she has been looking up to him more and more as they do things together. There may have always been a brother-sister bond there, but now it is growing with each day.

What’s to come for our family? We are going back to the Canadian Embassy today as we have been invited to a pub/reception for the outgoing Canadian Ambassador to Ukraine. Then tomorrow, while you are cheering on the Riders against the ‘Stamps, Murray and Evan will be cheering at a football match, too. They are going to their first soccer game as father & son, to watch the Kyiv Dynamo against the Kharkiv Metallist. Go Riders! Go Dynamo!

Then it’s the flight home on Sunday and life begins at home. We (Donna and Murray) are looking forward to getting back to Canada. But we need to keep in mind that Evan and Valentina will be the ones that may be facing culture shock. No more Russian speakers or Russian alphabet; different food; living in the countryside vs the city; living with a couple of boring adults rather than with a bunch of kids; wanting to play with other kids but having to deal with strange languages. As much as there will be new wonders and lots of excitement, all of us—parents, family and friends—will have to be sensitive to how a couple of little kids have to deal with all this change. We must all give them lots of encouragement, love and time. And then, before you know it, they will be rambunctious, rollicking, rotten little wonderful Canadian kids, just like the rest of them out there. Look out, they are on their way!!

SEE YOU SOMETIME SOON IN S’TOON!!!

Adoption Announcement and Movie

At 9:17 a.m. (Ukrainian time) on Monday, July 28, proud parents Donna Marie Zaleschuk and Murray Robert Long received official documents to adopt Evan Victor Robert (7 years, 46.3 lbs) and Valentina Anna Marie (28 months old, 23.8 lbs). And, by way of the same court documents, proud children Evan Victor Robert and Valentina Anna Marie adopted Murray Robert (43 years, 205 lbs) and Donna Marie (vitals undisclosed in interests of writer's health). All family members are doing fine and are now back in Kyiv doing final immigration paperwork.

Attached is a video about nashi sonychka---our little sunshines. Thanks to Donna! [Unlike the birthing process, we feel its ok to show this type of video...]

As Ozzy Says...

"Mama, I'm coming hoooooome"...


Our flights are booked and we will be returning home on August 3rd... subject to the vagaries of airflight and Air Canada in particular ...


[This is Murray talking: Now I know how much you have all missed me in particular and are dying to meet me at the airport and shower me with gifts, kisses and money. Now, unless you are bringing money-and lots of it-I ask that you control your "Mur-mania" and not come looking for us at the airport. I'm not sure our tired and bewildered kids could handle the thousands of screaming fans that no doubt would be there if we let them know our fl;ight arrival information. For those wanting more information to satisfy their needs, please go to my website at http://www.murthedisillusionedmeglomaniac.com/ ]

Heeeeeeeere’s Da Kids!!

Evan Victor Robert and Valentina Anna Marie. They are our sonycka----our little sunshines.
Anyway, here’s a few pictures for our blog. To see more, we will be posting a movie tommorrow on the “You Tube” site. Stay posted for a posting tommorrow hopefully...the final edits are in progress...a DonnaZ film production!

We hope you understand us having to make you wait for these pictures. Just like we will need some time at home with them on our own to get used to us, we also want time to know them for ourselves first before introducing them to the rest of our world. We think we have that right. After all, we will be their parents as of Tuesday.

We want to talk about Evan and Valentina in this posting, but you will hear a lot more in the future. Evan is our boy’s anglicized name and his Ukrainian nickname is “Vanya”. His been through a lot in his seven years; we can see it in his eyes—and sometimes he acts older than his age. But as we have gotten to know him, he is becoming more of the 7-year old boy that he really is. He loves to be outside playing sports, especially football. (Note: This refers to soccer actually, although soon enough we will have him playing the kind with the weird shaped ball and singing “Green is the Color”…Four and oh! Can you believe it? But I digress…)

Evan is quick with puzzles and at picking up and writing English. Of course, he has a very well qualified teacher in Donna. He is curious and likes to create with lego blocks etc. We have re-enacted the flights to Kyiv and on to Toronto and Saskatoon many time already. And the other day, Vanya used Valya’s RV pull toy along with his lego bus. He make-believed that he had “guests” come by bus to the house, and then mama and papa invited the guests into the house. After awhile, the guests had to leave, and took the bus back to the plane. What an imagination!

An then there is Valentina, or “Valya”, or as Donna has come to call her: “Little Stinker”. She is quiet because of here developmental lags, but she is still quite the kid with quite the character for 28 months. She sometimes likes to babble in her own language…much like Murray. Her favorite toy is her tea set, although we just gave her a plush purple cow backpack and that has gone over really well. Valentina really watches her older brother closely, and she is starting to mimic him more and more each day. We can’t wait for her to begin talking and soon enough we expect her to be reciting Shakespeare.

Boy, it’s great being parents and bragging about your kids…

The Day We Met Vanya and Valya

Vanya and Valya. Boy and girl. Those are their nicknames. We first met them on the morning of July 5th. Here’s an excerpt from our journal of that day:

We were waiting in the meeting room, the same one that we spent 5 hours in the day before waiting to meet the Director of the orphanage.. This time things happened much quicker. We were sitting preparing ourselves for an extended wait like yesterday when we heard some footsteps. But they weren’t like the footsteps from yesterday: plop, plop, plop. Instead they were quick little footsteps: plup, plup, plup, plup, plup.

And in came walking a little girl with big brown eyes, wide and scared. She had never been in that room. She had never seen these strangers. She was completely out of her element. But the deputy director brought her in and she stood before us, bewildered and shy. Her wide eyes soon looked down and away. She was just doing her best to hide herself away from all this. It was too much for her. She didn’t want to look at these strangers. She didn’t even have her regular caregivers around. It was much too much. One of the strangers, a woman with auburn hair (who someday she would know as “Mama”) went to her and asked if she was sleepy. She was. It was her nap time after all. The woman said some strange words and picked her up and tried to cradle her. But the little girl began to cry. She hid her eyes as she cried. She didn’t like all this strangeness. She didn’t know that it was a very difficult and scary step in a new chapter in her life. But things did get a bit better. First of all at about that time a boy came in. That boy’s face was familiar...it was her brother after all. She stopped crying and watched him.

As Valya was being introduced and was upset, a home care worker brought down a little blond boy. Actually, he wasn’t that little for his age. He was quite tall. They brought him down and escorted him toward the office and then towards another hall, he was just following the workers. Finally (as is the protocol) the deputy director brought him forward and introduced him to us. He was instructed to hug us both and he did. He was trained to follow instructions. He behaved beyond his years. After all, in many ways, he was on his own in this orphanage and had been on his own a lot before that.

Then he looked at his sister and was a bit bewildered himself, perhaps because these two strangers were making her cry. Then another woman (our facilitator) that was with the English speaking couple started talking and asking a few questions in Russian. He answered quietly but not overly shyly. Then we went into a second room with a table. The tall man brought out some puzzles and the boy eagerly went at them. He ended up doing the hardest one first and he was extremely quick completing it. He worked on puzzles lots with this group, competing how fast they could be done. He must have been one of the fastest. Before we knew it, he was done three more puzzles.

Meanwhile sister Valya was in the other room. She was still confused but had settled down some. And they had out a little soccer ball. She watched the boy and the tall man kick the ball around. Boy oh boy that ball was intriguing. After all, she knew that game from playing it many times with her friends and caregivers outside. She even smiled and chased it herself. And Vanya was having fun with the ball passing it back and forth with the tall guy. But pretty soon it was time to go and we got some hugs and away they went.
We left the orphanage around noon and went back to the apartment. We are not ashamed to say we both cried at the apartment and later that day. Seeing those two wonderful children, hearing about how they came to the orphanage, seeing their lives now, and knowing how we might change their lives. It was completely and utterly overwhelming.

It has been 3 weeks since we wrote the words above. Vanya now acts much more like a 7 year old. Valya cries when we end our visits and pass her back to the caregivers. Now it feels like we are the ones handing them over to the strangers. Three days from know we will be very happy not to have to do that anymore.

This Morning: We Fly Home with the Kids! (Well, sort of…)

It’s Thursday afternoon. The thermometer indicates its 37C in the shade and the air has a sickly sweet smell of smoke from the steel factory that makes your eyes sting. So we are staying in the a/c apartment between our morning and afternoon visits with the kids.

So, whaddya want to know about the kids? Well, there will be no pictures until the weekend, but lets give them initials: E.V.R.L. (the seven year old boy) and V.A.M.L. (the two year old girl). Lets start with a posting that talks about what happened at our visit this morning.

Our morning visit began at 9:30 when we ask the receptionist to see the kids. A few minutes later EVR came bounding down the hallway and gives both of us a hug. A minute or two later, VAM came down the hall with her care giver, her short foot steps echoing “plop, plop, plop” on the lino. This morning our hour and a half visit started with going outside on the orphanage grounds. EVR and Murray brought out the soccer ball as usual and played for a half hour or so. We played on a small soccer “pitch” about half the size of a hockey rink. (I call it that not as usual reference to a true soccer pitch but because it is slanted down a bit of a hill). For a seven year old, EVR has pretty darn good hand-eye coordination and can drop-kick a soccer ball with the best of them. Meanwhile, VAM and mama went for a walk around the grounds and played a bit of soccer with their own small ball. Mama also tried blowing bubbles but VAM was a bit wary of that whole scene.

Then it was snack time. We all sat outside on a bench. VAM wolfed down her banana in no time flat and had juice from a cup. (BTW: If anyone has any tips on how to get a two year old to suck with a straw we’d be much obliged.). EVR had his banana, juice box and a yogurt. Both of the kids sure enjoy the snacks that Mama prepares.

Then we headed back inside the orphanage and gathered around a table where we played with large lego-style blocks. VAM likes to dump them out, pull them apart and put them back in the bag. After a while, she shifted over to her tea set, to bring stuff out of the bag and stack it. Based on what I have seen, I am confident I can have her cleaning out the dishwasher by September…

For EVR, this was his first go with the blocks as we usually have him working with Mama on numbers and ABC’s while VAM played with these blocks. So, EVR’s first project was going to work building a plane and telling us about his trip to Kyiv a couple of weeks ago with Mama to see the doctor. Then he built a bus that transfers passengers from the airport to the plane. And then we built an airport terminal. Yesterday, we brought in a small globe and explained to EVR how we would fly back home through Kyiv and Toronto. So today we decided to do the whole trip in his own plane around the room, with a flight from Kyiv to Toronto, a switch of planes at the airport, and then the flight to Saskatoon. He understands quite well that there will be a big distance between Ukraine and his new home in Canada. Then Papa’s (or “Pops” as I now tend to be referred) “machina” or car (which used to be the airport bus) drove us home and right into our garage (which used to be the airport) that EVR had seen in the pictures of our house. We can only hope it will be that easy when we actually do make the trip!

The entire time EVR was flying us all home, VAM was watching and taking in the whole trip in her own way. She sure likes to watch her brother. Other than their visits with us, our children have little chance to interact with each other because they are kept in separate groups at the orphanage depending on their ages. Actually, we are quite fortunate that they are in the same orphanage and we can have our visits with them together. In Ukraine, orphanages are usually set up separately for infants to 3 yrs old, then another for 3-7, and then another for 7 yrs +. The orphanage where our children are at includes all children from infants to 16 years old. Many of the older children are currently away at summer camp, so it is quiet here except for the infants and toddlers. In fact, when we first arrived, the orphanage staff had to pull EVR out of camp to see us. At first he thought he was being taken back to the orphanage because he had done something wrong, and protested having to leave the camp. However, when he learned that mama and papa were there to meet him, he was happy to return. And since then, he’s made no objection about being back at the orphanage.

Back in Mariupol

Well, after six days away from the kids we've come to realized that this whole parenting thing is something we most surely definitely absolutely overwhelmingly withoutadoubt want in our life.

We were back to see the kids today and boy oh boy is was great to see them again. Our boy (or at least soon to be boy) ran down the hall to hug us when he saw us. Our girl was a bit under the weather with a cold, but she cried when Donna had to give her back to the caregivers.

Stay tuned over the next couple of days and we'll tell you a little bit about what they are like. Maybe you'll even see some pics by the weekend....

Searching for "Our Other Family"

Our whole trip up to this point has been about searching and finding our own little family of four….well, six actually if you count the cats. But of course one of the reasons we chose to adopt from Ukraine, and Donna remained stubbornly and angelically persistent, was her roots in Ukraine. As we planned the trip, we hoped we’d be able to dig up some of those roots as well as planting the seeds for our own family.

Donna’s family comes from the Horodenka Region of Western Ukraine. While we thought we might end up in Western Ukraine for the adoption process, God had pointed us to the Southeast to find our two angels . So, as explained in our previous posting, we felt the best time to search for our “other family” was during the ten day court waiting period. And what a search it was! Here is Donna’s story in her own words:

We got up at 6 a.m. in Chernivtsi with the plan of traveling through the Horodenka region and ending up in Kolomeya to spend the night. We asked the hotel reception to make arrangements for a taxi for the day, for about $60 plus gas. We drove for about an hour north of Chernivtsi to the village of Zalishyky (a.k.a. “Zaleschukew”), my name sake. The village had its own logo with a unicorn, or as Murray put it, a mule with a pointy nose signifying the stubbornness of the Zaleschuks. It appeared to be a small village and with a market and a mix of catholic and orthodox churches.

It was Saturday morning and there was a market going on in the centre of town, mostly produce and we even heard piglets squealing. We walked through a large cemetery and recognized similar family names from home----Danyluk, Yakimchuk, Trach, Pankiw, Balan. But no names like Zaleschuk.

Then it was onto to reunite with my Aunt Parasaka who I last saw 21 hears ago when I was on a student exchange at the University in Chernivtsi. I had not contacted them beforehand or made any arrangements, so other than some vague memories, we where searching blind. As we drove towards Horodenka we passed large fields of wheat, durum, corn and sunflower along the way. The country looked a little like the drive between Aberdeen and Wakaw. (The road was paved but we certainly won’t complain about SK highways anymore after traveling on the bumpy roads of Ukraine.)

The first village we stopped at was Cherniatyn, and the cab driver told me to check with the local post office for names. I spoke with the post mistress, who was wearing a scarf and had lots of gold capped teeth. I said I was from Canada, and looking for family by the name of Nykiforuk. She and I could converse easily in Ukrainian, and she could understand me. It was almost like talking to anyone of the older ladies from church. As it turns out the post mistress’s mother was a Zaleschuk. She said there were many Zaleschuks living in Cherniatyn. Most of the Zaleschuks were from around that area, not Zalishyky. She directed us to the next village to search for Paraska. Again we stopped at the post office and this time there was a line up of people, all women and a couple of young girls. As soon as we walked in we were greeted with curious looks. When I spoke, there was a flash of gold teeth again. This time, some crazy old baba grabbed my hand and kissed my cheek. I was confused, thinking she might be one of Paraska’s sisters who remembered me. She was babbling on about us coming from Canada and being so happy to see me. People were giving her funny looks, and I got her to let go of my hand. This time, the local post mistress thought there might be Nykiforuk’s living in the next village.

We went back to the taxi, and the crazy baba followed us because she wanted money. I was starting to give up hope of ever finding the village where Paraska lived. I was sure it was this one, as the church looked so familiar. We drove a couple kilometers down the road, then turned left onto a bumpy gravel road. This village was smaller than the other two. A young woman at the community centre did not know about Paraska. We stopped and asked a baba and she pointed us to a nearby street, saying it was the fourth house. We stopped there, but no one was home. I continued to walk further down the road, and low-and-behold I recognized Paraska’s house. As I came near, an older man came round from the back, and I did my usual spiel, saying I was from Canada looking for Paraska Nykiforuk. Does she live here? He said yes! Then he called into the house and wouldn’t you know it Paraska came out! We finally found her!
Turns out the man was Petro, Paraska’s son and he already knew we were coming. It’s like the old saying, “baba babyci skazala”(i.e. the Ukey baba phone tree) as Petro was just getting off the phone with someone had already called him to say some Canadians were looking for their house. Paraska is 82 now but looked the same as she did 21 years ago, except for quivering hands. Petro said he recognized me from previous photos, while Paraska did not. We hugged and I cried.

We went into the ‘valeika hata’ or large room of the house, which is now the living room. The inside of the house has since been painted and fixed up from the last time I was there. I showed photos from home but Paraska could not see all that well. They took us on a tour of house and yard. There is now running water and a modern bath in the summer kitchen, although the toilet is still outside. There is a large garden with bee hives for honey. They give most of the honey away to family and friends. There’s ducks in the barn, two large pigs, and some chicks, and a dog. Apparently the dog only barks at the neighbours, and not when ‘hosti’ or guests arrive. Petro’s wife was busy getting lunch. Yes, we had to be fed, no questions asked. We sat down with the family of six. Lunch started with shots of vodka, then sausage, bacon, verenyky, holubtsi and tomatoes. Murray tried some of Petro’s samahonka (home brew). The time was short as we were there less than 2 hours. They invited us to stay the night, and in hindsight I think we should have. This is another lesson in our journey for us of the importance of spending time with family.

Our driving tour ended in Kolomiya where we stayed at “On the Corner” B&B, a snazzy little place recommended by Lonely Planet (and us!) with a very welcoming and helpful family. Kolymiya is known for its craft and the town is quiet and peaceful and near the Karpaty mountains with plenty of clean, fresh air. We didn’t have time to get to the mountains, but we have vowed someday to bring the kids back here and to Horodenka.

An eight hour bus ride on Ukraine’s secondary highways is not recommended for the faint of stomach. But that is what we faced as we started heading back east, first to Vinnitsya to meet up with friends. At one point on the trip, we were caught behind a funeral procession for half an hour. The bus could not pass the people walking on the street behind a half-ton truck where the body lay. I’d like to see that happen in Kyiv! Vinnitsya was a small city that kind of reminded us of Saskatoon. It was a nice visit but we were aching to get back to Mariupol, via a flight from Kyiv. So, tonight as we write this blog posting, we are flying back into Eastern Ukraine to Mariupol, eager to reunite with the kids, officially become parents in less then a week, and never leave them again.

Enough of this traveling stuff. We want to be parents!!

The Eagle Lands at Chernivtsi’s Super-Uber-Mega-Monster Market

All our readers will remember our July 14 posting concerning the markets and Murray (a.k.a the buzzard) and Donna (a.k.a. the Eagle). Well, here’s another story for you.

Chernivtsi is located in Western Ukraine. Donna was very keen on visiting here because she was here in 1987 on a university student exchange and wanted to see how things had changed in the post-Soviet era. She also wanted to travel to the surrounding communities where her family originated from. We went after the court date during the 10 day waiting period. Although it was very, very hard for us to leave the kids for a couple of days, we felt this was the best time because we didn’t want to just keep visiting and only playing with them; parenting is yet to come. They might get used to us as only being playmates and not parents. (And while Donna might look OK, Murray in bunny ears and a little one-piece with a pompom on his ass just wouldn’t do…OK sorry bad pun but I had to do it…) Anyway, so we made a quick trip over to Chernivtsi. The town is about 250,000 people, with a beautiful university --Yuri Fedkovych Chernivtsi National University----and many shady parks and clean streets. Although it has changed lots since Donna was here---- it is much more colorful and there is a lot of effort to upgrade buildings, making into a typical central European look. The area is beautiful and it’s good to be out of the pollution of Mariupol’s steel mills.










Perhaps the most memorable activity of our trip so far was our visit to the Kalynivsky Market just outside of town. It is a conduit for goods coming into Ukraine from neighboring countries and attracts 50,000 people a day. It is spread out over close to a quarter section of land, 1000’s of stalls, millions of choices. It was a perfect place to shop for some kids’ clothes and other items. Just look at the pictures…

And, so the Eagle of the markets took flight…Donna soared over the market starting the morning and carrying on for a number of hours. She was after all, shopping for her two little eaglets ---the goods and prices are much better than those in the Mariupol markets. Murray the Buzzard flapped along trying to keep up. But, for the Eagle, it was almost like she was flying over the biggest gopher colony known to man. And they were all newborn gophers, too stupid to dive down their holes. It was overwhelming. She soared and dove in on a buy; soared and dove in a buy; soared and dove…until she could soar and dive no more. Indeed, as Donna said herself as we trudged out of the market: “Okay, the Eagle has landed.” Sometimes you can just have too much of a good thing.

But I’m sure after a bit of a rest, the Eagle will be ready to soar again, only for her eaglets!

Our Big Day

It was another “hot one” in Mariupol, humid with the temperature over 30C. And it was our day in court. We went into a room the size of a normal school classroom, with no air conditioning nor fans. The front of the room was dominated by three large wooden chairs with high backs. Carved into the backs was the old style Soviet hammer and sickle.

The judge came into the room. We all rose for this woman, in her mid 50s. She began to read our application to the court and our translator interpreted for us. Then they asked us to stand and answer the questions: why do you want to adopt these two children? Murray thought he was prepared for this question, but the heat and wait we had endured had dulled me and I stammered out an answer. Then Donna stood and was asked why we wanted to adopt from Ukraine. She went straight into babbling in Ukrainian about the connection to Ukraine with her baba and dido. Our facilitator furtively gave Donna the “thumbs up.” She had told us that it would be good for our case to speak Ukrainian, although it would be unlikely the judge would understand as she knew little Ukrainian herself, only Russian.

The prosecutor asked about the Ukrainian culture at home; again Donna spoke in Ukey about our “hromoda” (community) and lots of culture, language, church and a bilingual school. The court secretary read our three page application to court. She asked the other two reps for any questions, one from the orphanage and regional administration. They each had to make the case why the adoption can go ahead. Each did their thing and then the “crown” prosecutor (or persecutor as our translator called him) was asked if there were any objections.

Then the judge proceeded to go through our entire dossier. Although she did not read each page, she went through each section including the SDA stuff---registration letter, approval letter, and also all the letters we faxed to the SDA to accept our application. It was all there! We would have loved to have taken a photo of that 6 inch thick bundle of papers. It reminded Donna of how much work she put into getting us this far.

At the end, the judge asked if we had anything to add. Donna did her spiel in Ukrainian asking for a favourable decision to adopt the children and to allow us to change the kids name; that we love the children and have taken to them. Murray also spoke a few words in English. Then the judge, secretary and prosecutor left for 10 minutes. When she returned, she read the court degree. We were impressed how well she pronounced Saskatoon and Saskatchewan (better than many people from Ontario!). For each name---ours and the kids---she said it in full, and also added our birth dates. This was said numerous times. It was cute how she pronounced Murray’s name----Long, Moorai Rubart. And then it was over.

Subject to a 10 day waiting period, the Court decree will take effect on July 26th. Because it is on the weekend, we cannot take custody of the kids until the 28th. So, we know you are waiting for pics, but we’ve decided to wait until everything is final….We know you can be patient, we have been for 7-some years now.

Daily ‘Doption Duties…and Soaring Like an Eagle and Hovering Like a Buzzard

When we were preparing for this trip and talking with other couples, we were warned that there would be a lot of “down time” or waiting time. Other than visiting the kids there wasn’t much to be done. Well, I don’t know if its because the summer, where we are, who we are, or that we are simple folk who can be easily amused, but we sure seem to be keeping ourselves busy. We are finishing up our third week here and we still feel we could catch up on some rest.

So, what the heck have we been doing? Well the day starts at 6-ish with the dogs barking as usual. We are near a single dwelling residential area and everyone and their dog has a dog. The barking can go all night and when we can sleep through it, it wakes us up in the morning. Then it’s a quick walk to the bakery and the market to pick up things for breakfast, etc.-bread, watermelon, vegetables, fresh peaches and so on. Everything is grown right around here. Even pineapples, but they are not quite in season yet. Then it’s back to the apartment for breakfast, maybe some blogging, laundry or whatever. And laundry is almost a daily chore as it depends on how much space is available on the clothes lines on our balcony. Its not like at home where we can easily get 5 loads of laundry, washed, dried and folded away in a couple of hours!

Our morning visit with the kids goes from 930 to 11. It’s about a 10 minute walk over to the orphanage. We go in and ask for the kids to come down. Thanks to Donna’s Ukrainian, we have gotten to know the security guards well so we chat with them while we wait. Our routine with the children is to go outside for soccer, frisbee, or just walking around with our 2 year old. Then we have a snack either inside or outside (banana, cookie, juice) and then its time for inside. Donna has been working with our boy on numbers and abc’s, both speaking and writing. He’s going to get to the letter “r” today. They have English workbooks in the markets here that are a big help. I play with our girl: blocks, tea set, or go for another stroll outside. Then the boy gets into puzzles, and there are some intense card games with his mom-to-be. Before you know it, the hour and a half is over. We do something similar in the afternoon from 4 to 530, but usually less outside because its very warm and humid here, up to 30C or 35 C with the humidity.

During the afternoon between visits, we have our lunch and often go downtown or to the central market to pick up whatever is needed. Usually, we make a stop at the “internet club” to make our postings. We’ve also made it out to the beachfront. On other days we have gone to church, toured the city a bit, or just stayed home out of the heat. After our second visit, we have supper (either in or out) and then go for a walk, visit the internet club, read a bit, or watch Ukey TV. The day always ends with an episode of West Wing on the computer and some tea and chocolate ice cream out of a plastic bag.

Our most frequent activity, besides visiting the orphanage, has to been going to the central market in Mariupol. Again, this is a huge market with close to 1000 stalls, each probably 8’ by 6’, selling pretty much anything you’d want. Small scale free enterprise is alive and well in Ukraine, and with many sellers and many buyers, it works very well. Too bad we didn’t have something like this at home…(WalMart can go to H**L as far as I’m concerned!)

Speaking of WalMart, as much as Donna likes to praise it at home to bug me, there is no doubt that her soul belongs in the markets of Ukraine. It touches some deep, perhaps genetic, Ukrainian element within her. As she slowly walks down the food stalls, the clothes stalls, or (especially) the shoe stalls she carefully surveys the wares, like an eagle soaring high above looking for prey. She is a very fussy eagle though—some nasty gopher won’t do, it’s gotta be a tasty rabbit. As for me, I’m more of a scavenging buzzard that hovers around, spies what I need and dives in on that “carcass”--- gets it and gets out. Of course, these two strategies inherently do generate some conflict during our times in the markets, because as you know eagles and buzzards don’t get along too well. Thankfully, though, that only happens in the markets.

Donna’s Day with Kyiv, Kids and Chaos by Car

We got up early at 4:45 a.m. to get to Mariupol’s airport for Donna, the kids and a care worker/nurse off to Kyiv for their checkups at the medical centre, as required by Canadian immigration. Because we do not yet have legal responsibility for the kids, the orphanage needs to send someone to be responsible for the kids. And, to save a bit of money, Murray was left behind to (sigh) do laundry, pick up some stuff and generally goof off on his own for the day. Here’s Donna’s story.

Today was another busy day but a great day that will become one of many “days of firsts” with our kids. We were in the paper chase trail again for the adoption on the Ukraine side of things. However, this one involved a trip to Kyiv with our two kids in tow. And it was their first plane trip!

Overall, they both traveled great! I had visions of two children, on the plance cringing in terror, throwing up from motion sickness, and basically turning against me for any care. Instead, they were almost like regular jet setters themselves, calm and quiet, just taking things in. My toughest challenge was to answer all of the 7 year old boy’s questions about the emergency description card and how the life vest works.

Both kids did very well during the take off. Our boy kept his nose pressed again the window looking out over the land and sea with the ships. He thought the checkered look of yellow and green fields looked strange because they were so far below. Then we were in clouds most of the trip to Kyiv. Once we started to descend into Kyiv, he became excited to see all the “matrushkas” (small yellow buses) zipping about like toy cars in the streets below. He was also worried how we would land. Would the plane actually dropped from the sky straight to the ground? Again, with a hand gesture, I explained that the landing was just like the take off---just as gradual but going down.

Our driver met us at the domestic airport in Kyiv, an old style, Soviet place with transfer buses from the plane pulled by a something akin to a ‘52 International 2 ton grain truck. We went to the Canadian Embassy first. Its foyer seemed so “Canadian”—nothing colourful or identifying, just neutral, cold, bilingual. So a-political Canadian, eh! Then we drove in very congested traffic to the medical centre that does the examinations for people wanting to immigrate to Canada, USA, Australia or New Zealand. We had a good doctor who provided me with lots of information. Bottom line, as we expected, the kids are in great shape and there are no major health concerns that would prevent them from coming to Canada with us.

I left the kids with the nurse to go with our driver to see our facilitator in the northern part of Kyiv. Sure, it was inside the city but it was still a 3 hour trip there and back, with incredibly congested streets. (I sure won’t complain about Circle Drive in S’toon any more…) We literally would sit through 4-6 light changes before making it across to the next street. I said three times to our driver that we should just park the van and take the Metro. The driver preferred to drive (and get paid more per hour I suppose…). After meeting our facilitator for only 5 minutes, our return to the kids was even worse, and it was one of the most scariest, “white knuckle” rides I’ve ever been on. The driver’s mission was to get me from point A to B in the required time, no matter what it took. At one point, we were in a three lane street with 6 lanes of cars, when he would veer out of the left lane and speed into the oncoming traffic lane to get to the next set of lights. Then he edged across the 6 lanes of cars like a snake to the far right lane, jumped the curb to drive along the tram tracks, bucking pot holes and mud. At one point the tram was coming toward us, and he swerved back on the sidewalk, around a couple pillars under an overpass, and then back on the tram tracks. It was just like a car chase scene in a fast paced, action packed movie. The only difference is that we were chasing the clock.

I learned something as a mother-to-be though. One week ago, I’m not sure I’d have been able to cope with that trip. But now that I know its for the kids sake, I can endure most anything if its for their benefit.

Our return flight was smooth. Our two-year old girl sitting in the seat in front of me liked to play peekaboo with me and other passengers on the plane. Our boy was curious about the instructions for an emergency landing that were in the pocket in front of each seat. He asked a lot of questions: where was the life vest? (we felt for them under our seats); can he see one; why do we need a life vest; is it like a parachute; what is this button on the picture (to inflate the vest); and that button and that (whistle, light). Again, much of the flight was over cloud. However, once we got closer to Mariupol, he was fascinated to see the lights of the city. And then when we landed and still traveling fast on the run way, the lights on the tarmac looked like they were whizzing by. He thought other planes were criss-crossing around us. One other funny note: When the pilot spoke before the flight left from Kyiv, he obviously spoke Ukrainian. With a smirk, our boy said that because the pilot often said “tak, tak” (yes, yes), that he was speaking Ukrainian and not Russian (da is yes). For most of the flight coming back, he would poke me, and ask a lot of questions, or make a lot of statements analyzing the situation as if he spoke by fact.
Despite the cars, chaos and Kyiv, ‘cause of the kids, I will always remember this “first day” of many “first days” with our kids.

A note to everyone…… Thanks very much for your words and good wishes by email or messages on our blog. We enjoy them so much and it help gives us a connection to home. Sorry we don’t reply directly, as we usually have limited time at the internet café near our place. But please, please, keep them coming!
Thanks, Donna and Murray.

A Little Bit o’ Life in Mariupol

We have been in Mariupol almost a week now and we’d like to think of ourselves as on our way to becoming “Mariupoleans”. We have our apartment. Our “job”—the best one in the world right now—is to go and spend time with the kids a couple of times each day, in between their meals and other routines. We spend our day otherwise doing the normal things of life like getting groceries, going to the market, doing the laundry and finishing the day with an episode of West Wing on DVD on the computer. (OK, maybe the last item isn’t that common with our neighbours.) There always seems to be much to do and, because of travel and the adopting excitement, we can’t really say we are getting the sleep we expected.

Mariupol is certainly more of a working class town than Kyiv. A lot more steelworkers than office workers. A lot more Ladas and Fiats than Mercedis, Hummers and Lexus’s. It certainly has its “steeltown” air pollution. It’s on the Sea of Azov and also is a bit of a tourist/beach destination in the summer for those from northern Ukraine. Right outside of town there are fields of wheat that look no different than what’s on the “home quarter” or the “Marr place”, except that some of it is already in the swath and being harvested.

Being in the eastern part of Ukraine, Mariupol is much more Soviet/Russian influenced than western Ukraine. Most people here tend to speak Russian. I would have liked to see how things were 25 years ago prior to Gorbachev, Perestroika and Ukrainian Independence. The main remnants of those days are now the housing and the attitudes. People live in the same apartment blocks with concrete stairs and small elevators, thankfully as our apartment is on the 7th floor. But people do a lot of work on the inside of their apartments to fix them up. So our place is quite comfortable on the inside. Right now as I type this, I have the air conditioning on and am watching cable TV. (actually one of those fishing shows…yeah I’m sick… but I just noticed I’ve been watching for 15 minutes and the guy hasn’t caught a thing…whaddyaknow a “real life” fishing show!!...) The only problem is you have to know Russian or Ukrainian to understand it.

The attitudes? Well, we saw one bread seller in the market, even with a line up 5-6 deep, saying: “I’m taking my break now and you’ll have to wait”. Customer service is not a big thing in the markets. But, in the new “bigbox” stores there are attendants here, there and everywhere, but you certainly pay for it. We like to buy our vegetables and fruit in the open market where people come in and sell their produce from their gardens/farms right along the sidewalk. (I want to talk about Donna in the markets, but stay tuned for that as another posting…)

There are certainly other remnants of the Soviet era around: beaches with the big steel mills in the background; street names like “Lenin Avenue” and “50 Years of USSR Street”, and monuments to “fighting machine” and “victims of facism”. Perhaps the most memorable image is our picture of the monument to Lenin with a big box store in the background. What would ol’ Vlad think? I can’t remember what CCCP stood for 25 years ago (and am not sure if many here do now either), but I’m convinced it now it stands for Corporatism, Capitalism, Consumerism and Pevo (i.e. beer which goes for 75 cents for a 500 ml bottle). I’m not sure about the benefits of the first three. The last one is a definite benefit. I think the jury is still out on whether a strong “middle class” will establish itself in Ukraine, or if the rich will continue to get richer and the poor, poorer. This is a question we still debate in North America too.

Lenin stands guard over a Ukraine's equivalent of a "big box"

It sure ain't easy preparing for adoption

[This is Murray talking; Donna does not sanction this particular posting:] You know what I’ve concluded after the past few days. Most of you guys out there that had your kids by birth got it too easy. Maybe it was a bottle of wine, or a blackout, or even a snowstorm in January. Then you are pregnant…a few hormonal meltdowns…a debate over whether to buy chocolate or real cigars….and then a few hours of labour. And there you have it…Now I won’t debate you on the work of dealing with an infant and early or late night feedings. Maybe things even up a bit there.
But as far as the point of deciding to conceive vs. deciding to adopt to the point of legal responsibility for a child(ren), you really can’t compare the two processes. Now, many of you know the work we (OK, OK mostly Donna) have done and the patience and heartache we have experienced over the past three years in trying get approval from Ukraine. Now that we are over here we are certainly thankful, but there still is certainly a lot more work to be done. For our time in Ukraine, I suppose you could compare this portion of the process to labour. We aren’t talking 15 or 20 hours, not even 15 or 20 days. We’re talking a good month of meeting with officials, getting papers processed and, of course the best part, meeting and getting to know our children.

In labour there is a midwife. In adoption in Ukraine there is a facilitator/interpreter. And our midwife is “Y”. And she is Awesome with a capital A. She doesn’t need to have the knowledge of a woman’s body; she possesses the knowledge of an incredibly larger and more complex system of bureaucracy, regulation, internal politics and paper pushing: the Ukrainian adoption and legal systems. Every single paper needs to be notarized. Every document needs to be forwarded and run through the system. And Y (the “midwife”) knows the ropes, knows the best ways of doing things, and has the relationships to make it all happen for us.

For example, yesterday in between visits to the kids, Y and Donna and I made trips to the regional inspector’s office, the orphanage director’s office, and lawyer/notary in order to get all the documents ready for the court date. It was a full 12 hour day, making things happen so that she could get back to Kyiv and get things ready there as well. And we came along to sign the papers and do what needed to be done. All in all it was a smooth adoption day thank to Y.

And the most important news...

Oh yeah, perhaps you were wondering about the kids. Well we still don’t want to say a lot right now but we can tell you this: We are in Mariupol, Ukraine along the Sea of Azov where it hot and somewhat polluted (with 2 huge Steel Mills that would make Hamilton, ON blush!), and hot somewhere We have had the unforgettable joy of meeting our kids, a 2 year old girl and her seven year old brother. Both are great children. The “adoption labour” is almost over….the joy of our new family is so close we can taste it.

Ukraine by Metro, Train and Automobile

[Note: Sorry for such a long break in our postings. As we indicated in our last posting, for the time being we will not be providing much detail about the adoption process itself, for the sake of the children. Hopefully we’ll be able to give you the details tomorrow or the next day. All things considered, things are going well.]

After our appointment on July 1, we were not able to book a train ticket until Thursday, July 3rd in the evening. So we had all day on the 2nd and most of the day on the 3rd to be tourists in Kiev. Some of the things we did:
Traveled to outskirts of Kyiv to the Ukraine Museum of Folk Architecture where we were able to see houses from different regions of Ukraine.
Attended the Ukrainian National Opera and a rendition of Verdi’s the Masked Ball.

Unfortunately the opera was in Italian and “subtitles” in Russian so it was even hard for Donna to follow. Had to do a “google” of the play when we got home to figure out what was going on.
Went to a large market on the metro north of Kiev. The number of stores and the selection puts West Edmonton mall to shame. Of course the stores are just stalls, but it’s a good place to make a deal. And Donna was in shopping heaven.
Visited Chernobyl Museum which commemorated the lives lost including the fire fighters and army officers who went in to clean up the mess after the nuclear reactor exploded.
Climbed “Andrews Descent” (Andrivskiy Uzviz) (which seemed “oxy-moronical” to Murray…) which is an historic road from St. Andrew’s Church down to the lower town of Kyiv along the river. Along the street are vendors selling many cultural wares, so we did some wheeling and dealing on Ukrainian embroidered shirts and Donna was almost sweet-talked into the full outfit.

On July 3rd, we left our $70/night apartment…Kyiv ain’t cheap and got prepared for our overnight train ride. But first we experienced our first metro rides on a regular business day. We have been on the trains in China, Tokyo and New York and nothing matched this as far as the sardine can crowds. You get to make some really close friends whether you like it or not on the Kyiv metro trains….

Then it was on to the overnight train to Donetsk in East Central Ukraine. From there we traveled by hired car to the city where the orphanage is located. The train was quite the experience. We were booked into first class, two sleepers per cabin for the 12 hour trip. The trip over all was comfortable, although we woke often during the night to the sudden jerking of the train. It was good to watch the country side as we traveled along. Lots of wheat and sunflowers and the crop looks good so far. But I guess that info is too late for those of you who are deciding whether to plant wheat or canola back home.

Special mention is required of the bathrooms on the train. On her visits, Donna felt like one of those workers at the Chernobyl site after the explosion. There was a 2 minute time limit for exposure and the aftereffects are yet to be determined at this point. I’d hate to see what 3rd class was like…

We arrived in Donetsk at about 7 a.m. Although “Y” (our interpreter, facilitator and guide and all-around dependable woman) had requested a minivan, we were met with a car. So we stuffed our stuff in (including the big duffle bag of 75 Dawgs shoes) and hit the road. The drive included passing through some smaller towns. In some ways it was no different that driving through a town like Lashburn on the way from S’toon to Lloydminster. The countryside was quite similar to home; the only weird part was that there were no farms anywhere. I have no idea where they store their equipment in Ukraine, but they must have it somewhere because there are a lot of acres in crop.

We have been in town now for three days. All we can say right now is that things are going very well. Your prayers are working and we are forever grateful to everyone. Thanks in particular to Rev. and Jimmy…you know why. Oh, and of course, thanks to God for where were we are at this point. Hope to give you some real news real soon…really we promise.

Appointment Day!

Happy Canada Day! And a good day for us.

[Note: For the time being it is best for us not to provide too much detail about the appointment process or the children that were proposed for us. This is in the best interest of the children]

Our translator and right hand woman (We’ll call her “Y” for purpose of privacy at this point) called us at 8:30 a.m. to say that our appointment at the State Department for Adoptions (SDA) was at 12:00 p.m. We met Y just prior to the appointment. Things went very well. We will be heading off to south east Ukraine very soon to meet officials and then the children.

St Andrew’s Church is right beside the SDA office so we went in and said a prayer of thanks, took a deep breath and recovered from our very emotional experience. Your prayers and good wishes seem to be doing the job.

After resting a bit in the afternoon, went to the Canadian Embassy for a Canada Day BBQ. (BTW, Murray thanks all you taxpayers back in Canada that helped pay for the free hamburgers and non-stop beer). At the event we met other Canadian families who have adopted or are in the process of adoption just like us. O Canada was sung in English, then French, followed by the Ukrainian anthem. There was a funky Scottish band playing some Ukrainian tunes. It was good to visit with other Canadian expats.

I (Murray) then tried to sleep, but there’s a lot of things going through my mind as you can imagine. Stay tuned for the next episode of our adventures in Ukraine.

Happy Canada Day!

Lavra and Mata

"I'm sorry Murray and Donna, but you are the last team to arrive...."

Well, today was our last day of being “tourista”. For those of you who are Amazing Race fans, it was not a good day for us. More on that later.

We woke up early again around 5:30 a.m., and headed out the door by 8:00 a.m. Took metro to Kyiv Percherskva (caves) Lavra (senior monestary). See link on our list of links. Overall it was a very moving experience. Tourists and Orthodox pilgrims alike flock to see the Lavra. Set on 28 acres on grassy hills along the Dnipro River, the monestery’s tight cluster of gold domed churches is a feast for all eyes. For Orthodox pilgrims this is the holiest of the holy land. It was founded in 1051 by Greek St. Antoniy after Orthodoxy became the official religion in Kyiv Rus. Looks like lots of action was happening around Kyiv at the turn of the 1000 century (See notes on St. Sophia & St. Michaels). Caves were dug out where the monks lived, studied and worshipped. When they died, their bodies were preserved without embalming by the caves cool temperatures and dry air. Their bodies are mummified to today, hence worshippers believe them to be holy men.

We started off by joining other worshippers in a very small church just outside the walls of the lower lavra, where one priest blessed us on the head with a “hat” and then another anointed our forehead with oil. Women were chanting a song over and over again, and many people prayed in front of icons. It was very crowded but a very moving experience for us.

We proceeded to the Church of the Raising of the Cross which is the entrance to the first set of caves. Tourists are allowed only in some parts of the caves, as other areas are closed off to monks and orthodox clergy. We walked in completely dark passages, all but light by thin bees wax candle we were holding. The passages were very narrow and low, so Murray had to watch his head. You could see the mummified monks clothed in vestments behind glass. It was somewhat chaotic in the caves with worshippers moving from one monk to the next kissing the tombs, and lost in their religious ecstasy, the candle fames could easily have set head scarfs on fire. Hence we did not stay long in the caves.

From the Lavra we made our way to the statue of Rodina Mat (Nation’s Mother or formerly called Defence of the Motherland Monument commemorating the Great Patiotic War, WWII). The 62 m tall statue is also nick named “Tin Tits”. Looking over the Lavra churches, it was no doubt intended to symbolically give an impression of Soviet domination over the Ukrainian church. See photo of Murray paying homage to this great woman!

So, if we were in the Amazing Race, up to this point we would have been right in the middle of the pack. But things went wrong when we decided to cut across country to get to a different Metro station and see a different area of Kyiv. We ended up lost on a winding side street. We both were very tired (and cranky) from all the walking in the mid day heat. In the end, we hailed a cab to take us to the metro---less than 5 min ride for 40 hyrvnia---got very ripped off. Had we arrived at the check-in this day, Phil and some Ukrainian divchenka in traditional garb (i.e. with stilettos, tight low-cut jeans and short shirt and no bra) we would have definitely been the last team and eliminated from the race!

We were both exhausted when we got back to the apt that we slept from 6-8 p.m. Murr woke up and thought it was already the next morning and freeked out a bit.

We are getting messages of well wishes from friends and family back home for our appointment tomorrow. Your support means a lot.

One observation….Kyiv has more cars than it can handle. Cars park everywhere---on the street, or on part of the street and part of the sidewalk; on the sidewalk; in flower beds. And there isn’t a single parking meter to be seen. Looks like this city is missing out on some major revenue, and then loss in parking controls.

Hangin in Kyiv

It's been a weekend of getting oriented in Kyiv: figuring out where the markets are, learning the Metro (including how to avoid vertigo when going down 250 metres escalators at 45 degree slopes), watching Al Jazeerah TV news channel (without doubt best news channel I’ve seen), touring some sights.

What are highlights of the weekend? (1) Meeting our facilitator and family and enjoying a dinner at their apartment. (2) Going to church as St. Michaels with a bishop officiating along with 6 priests and a dearth of deacons…those Orthodox priests must have a light workload over here (j/k). (3) Touring St. Sophia Cathedral and being able to touch a piece of the thousand year old floor of the original Cathedral. (It was built in 1017-31 to celebrate Prince’s Yaroslav’s victory to protect Kyiv from tribal raiders. Think about all the people who may have walked over that tile…) (4) Walking around Kyiv and enjoying its modern post-Communism environment and how it changed since Donna visited in 1987. (5) Settling in our apartment and catching up on some sleep even if we are waking up at 5 a.m. (6) Recovering Donna’s lost bag fully intact. (7) and Riders smoked the Eskimos (see Rider link on our blog).

Amusement for Sunday was provided by Murray. It was mid-afternoon, at Volodymyrsky market, hoping to pick up a few things, hop back onto the metro and have lunch, as we both were getting peckish since not eating since breakfast. And we were both getting tired after standing in church for 3 hours plus lots of walking/sightseeing. When we bought “4’ eggs for tomorrow’s breakfast we were surprised to find the lady placing each egg carefully in a thin clear plastic bag, to which she handed over to Murray while Donna paid the equiv of 40 cents. Why 4 eggs and not a dozen? We don’t know if we will be staying in Kyiv or for how long after the adoption appointment on Tuesday, so there is no point buying too much food at this point for the apartment. Murray was feeling quite tired by this time, and hungry, and as the temperature was getting warmer outdoors, his top two buttons in his shirt were undone, but his tie was still on, and one side of his shirt had come out of his pants. Needless to say by the time we hopped back on the metro to go back to our apartment, the people gave him strange looks as he looked more like an afternoon drunk carrying a bag of four eggs. It was a sight to see. (And the eggs made it home safely.)

But on the positive side, the “excessive drinking” seems to be helping Murray better pick up Ukrainian Cyrillic alphabet. He is getting pretty good at the Metro and station names especially.

We also had a visit at our apartment from a Doctor who helps support families in international adoption. He spent well over one hour with us going over the possible medical diagnoses we may expect in the adoption file for each child. He told us some things we already knew, and also other things that will help us to better understand what conditions could be treated, not treated, or not accepted by Canadian immigration standards. He also gave tips on what information to look for in the files that will be presented to us at the State Adoption Agency (SDA). He helped to assure us that in many cases the medical conditions could be dated and/or overly exaggerated in the files and that seeing the child(ren) would give much better information.

We have one more day of touring on Monday (Caves Monestary), before July 1 and our appointment. We haven’t been notified of the time of our appointment. So, as everyone is back in Canada celebrating Canada Day, think of us, and send your well wishes and prayers this way.